THE RAT THING

by debbie lynn elias

“The best laid schemes o’ mice an’ men, gang aft a-gley.” Robert Burns, To A Mouse. Or, in the common vernacular, no matter how well thought out or planned, the best laid plans of mice and men often go awry, which in the case of Kevin Keresey’s THE RAT THING, awry is a good thing, a very good thing.

JJack and Joey are life long best friends. Living together in Venice, California (obviously west of Lincoln, near the beach and not in the “nicest” part of town with my guess being near Rose & 4th or the Dudley area) the two have spent over 30 years together just hanging out, slumming around, hanging out, watching the times change but never changing with it, hanging out. . . you get my drift here. But, there comes a point in every boy, er, man’s life, when change is inevitable and it’s time to grow up and for Jack and Joey it’s that time whether they like it or not.

Always looking for the easy way out, Jack is at the end of his rope. Not wanting the responsibility of a “real job”, he has eeked out a living with odd jobs here and there - stuffing envelopes, soldering printed circuit boards (nice soldering jobs there by the way) and always looking for the big payola. Adding to his “pressures” of fun-filled irresponsible existence is his girlfriend Irene who has just announced she is pregnant, wants to get married, wants a house, a home, a family. Joey, not the brightest bulb in the box, is devout a friend as a friend can be when it comes to Jack. A true follower, wherever Jack leads, Joey won’t be far behind. He too, has no aspirations but for winning one of many lotteries or a Publisher’s Clearing House grand prize and spends his days doing fraud telemarketing followed by nights of answering phones on the suicide hotline. Not successful at either, and having a conscience that Jack likes to overlook, he too is anxious for a quick easy payout. But as they say, it’s always darkest before the dawn and dawn is peeking over the horizon for Jack and Joey.

Jack recalls the infamous McDonald’s lawsuit. You know the one - the 1994 hot coffee suit where and 81 year old plaintiff spilled McDonald’s coffee (known to be 20 degrees hotter than that of any other restaurant), sued McDonald’s and received a verdict that included an award of $2.7 million in punitive damages. (What Jack forgot, however, was that on appeal, that judgment was lowered to $480,000.00.) What better way to make a quick buck than to sue a company? But wait. Coffee has already been done. He needs a better idea. How about a rat? Yeah, that’s the ticket. Someone needs to be bitten by a rat that’s been planted in a grocery store and then sue for contracting “rat diseases.” Brilliant plan. Why that’s worth, what, $50 million, $75 million, $120 million, $200 million? And who better than to be bitten by the rat than Joey.

Agreeing on this master plan, all that’s left are the finalization of the little details like, Joey is the one to be bitten, the incident has to occur in a local Venice store where he shops regularly and it can’t be a Marina Del Rey store because those are too clean and wouldn’t have rats (sorry Venice merchants), and it has to take place in the cereal aisle because rats like sugar and Joey likes Cap’n Crunch. And just one more thing - they need a rat, a task which Jack handles with ease by trapping one under their rented house. (Again, sorry Venice.) But, as I said, even the best laid plans go awry once Jack takes charge of Rizzo the Rat. Yes, he named the rat Rizzo. (Not so sorry, Dustin Hoffman. Once you see the film, you’ll know why. Rizzo is cute as a button.)

Kevin Keresey stars as Jack Kelly. A veteran of numerous indie films and a well known face to television audiences, he also serves as writer and director of THE RAT THING, thus tailoring Jack to showcase his own persona and talents, all to an excellent result. He is entertaining, annoying and charming all at the same. With the one hand you root for him. With the other, you want to slap him silly and say “grow up”, “get real”, “be a man.” Determined to retain the role of Jack for himself as well as direct the project, Keresey passed on offers to sell this screenplay to major studios and held out to see his vision through. After seeing Keresey here, he made the right choice. (And girls, let me tell you, he’s got a killer grin.) Joining as Jack’s partner in crime is Michael McGee as the woebegone Joey. A trained stage actor, Joey is McGee’s first lead film role. Tentative, unsure and often whiney in his performance, McGee does well playing second fiddle to the much stronger and charismatic Keresey. He brings a childlike naivete to Joey that goes miles in affording forgiveness to at least Joey for the get rich quick schemes the two concoct. Charmaine Cruz is effective as the annoying Irene while Holly Fulger as Joey’s girlfriend Barbara Jean has the goofy elan of an old acquaintance of mine, veteran actress Corrine Bohrer. And for certain, not to be missed is a cameo by attorney Gloria Allred.

Written and directed by Keresey, the concept while not original, is rooted in a familiarity to us all (McDonald’s coffee and quick money $$$$$$$), which Keresey then elevates to a new level with some well placed timely humor, some expected and welcome twists and turns and then adds a rat that is just as cute as cute can be. A semi-finalist in the 2002 Nicholls Screenwriting Competition, with THE RAT THING, Keresey’s voice is clear. The relationship between Jack and Joey, which takes front and center to the peripheral boyfriend-girlfriend scenarios that really could even be tossed out, is beyond believable and the dialogue is true to life and unstilted. Going the route of political correctness, Keresey even champions pre-natal health.

In his first outing as a director, the film demonstrates Keresey’s innate skill level with promises of even better things to come. Getting off to a very slow start both in story and in style, I was more than pleasantly surprised when the film livened up, thanks to better pacing and quicker development of events. There are some lensing problems with some shots that are too long or unnecessary, but the talent and vision is there and Keresey clearly defines his story. Disconcerting are stock shots of the bright colorful Venice boardwalk, blue, blue, blue Pacific Ocean and sky and some extraordinary nighttime glimpses of the Santa Monica Pier. These shots are so contrary to the cinematography and cinematic “plainness” and visual tone of the film that they stick out like a sore, albeit pretty, thumb. Also noticeable is an inconsistency with sound which is often “hollow” and echoey” and distorted among the scenes. I recently spoke with director Danny Boyle (“28 Days Later” and the upcoming “Sunshine”) who told me that “sound is 70% of a film” and is “critical to the film as a whole.” He’s right. Nothing is more disturbing than sound that vacillates up and down or in and out, is out of sync or is completely missing. Here, with visuals portraying some glorious sunny days on the Venice Beach, for anyone that’s been there, the roar of the ocean and the constant buzz of people is ever present and necessary “white noise” to the scene. I noted that to be missing here and given the personalities of the boys, having the “beach sounds” as well as neighborhood noise would have only furthered their characters’ personas. Also, for a character like Jack that spends his days building circuit boards in his living room, you can be sure he would have decent acoustics in his house.

Despite some of its shortcomings, for which I suspect I may draw comment from an upset filmmaker or publicist, THE RAT THING has humor and heart, be it from the mouse or the men. Sometimes it’s okay if your plans go awry...sometimes they even turn out better than planned.

Making its debut at Dances With Films in Los Angeles on Thursday, July 12, 2007, one plan you can count on is THE RAT THING.

Jack Kelly - Kevin Keresey
Joey Flanagan - Michael McGee
Irene - Charmaine Cruz
Barbara Jean - Holly Fluger

Written and directed by Kevin Keresey.